The Offspring

Posted by The Wizzle | Posted on Friday, February 3, 2012 at 6:41 PM


Oh, these kids made me laugh today!

It's amazing: when things are a little bit crazy (and let's face it, they're almost always at least a little bit crazy) and I feel myself building up steam, if I can somehow manage to laugh at something instead of scold, the entire situation is instantly Not A Problem.

Easy, right? Surely laughing is better than scolding, for all concerned, and it's not like my scolding has any effect anyway, right? So why is it so hard for me to do, in the moment?

I realized today that I think the responsibility I feel to teach these little people how to be good humans has somehow tricked me into thinking that no less-than-ideal word or action must go uncorrected. That if I make light of something, instead of use it as a teaching moment, that they will never learn or they won't grow up to be respectful and kind or I'm not doing my job.

But, I realized today, what will actually happen if I forget entirely how to laugh, as I am well on the way to doing, is that they will grow up thinking - and indeed knowing - that their mom is a dud.

I can't scold them into nice.

But I think I might just be able to laugh us all there.

* * * * *

If you want to laugh more, you should definitely see if you can get a five-year-old and have him or her write you something out of their very own brain every single day.

"Swiming in the oshone I see a dolfin Chassing after me. hongc hongc."

(Swimming in the ocean, I see a dolphin chasing after me. Honk honk!)

"I like to have hot choclit with marshmeloes. I like to swing well I bringk it. I like to woch a show aftr."

(I like to have hot chocolate with marshmallows. I like to swing while I drink it. I like to watch a show after.)

I will now allow you to recover yourselves. I myself very nearly died over "hongc hongc".

When your five-year-old has exhausted her writing energies, she should be given free reign over someone's hair:

More is, as it turns out, better.

She got new footwear today, and I never spent 40 more well-placed dollars than on these boots: sparing me two more years of the Sock Argument and the Rubbing Of The Sandal Bits.

Devlin had a haircut (not by me - I don't do that anymore since I gave him a combo Dumb-and-Dumber bang with mullet a week before family pictures last time. No, not on purpose.):

He watches Mythbusters and imagines his future career as a scientist, or something:

And Iris, while walking to our car on Camelback Road after shopping this afternoon, saw a dog (on a leash, with his owner) run toward traffic. She perceived the situation to be very grave indeed and boldly held out her hand and said "Hey buddy, there's cars out there!"

Comments (2)

I'm sorry, but did you just imply that Eve will wear her new boots for two YEARS? Is that possible? If my kids don't outgrow/ruin a pair in four months, I am completely thrilled.

"I cannot scold my kids into nice."

Well put.

And really. 5 year olds KNOW how to spell. It's Webster who got it all mixed up. ;)